Wednesday, March 7, 2012

A Math Lesson

This guy's article is void of the details.

I've crunched the numbers.

Actually, with the help of Professor Wilbor Smithsonian, head of the mathematics department at Rystrnrom University in Stockholm, and 20 lab monkeys,  I have put together a formula.

It's quite simple when you think about it:

Mark Sanchez + Bench = A

Peyton Manning + NYC = B

Now, since A is the common denominator, and B is carried over from the root variable of unknown X, the formula we have developed goes as follows:

A + B = Superbowl

I know what you're thinking:

"But Dr. Smithsonian, Dori, Bobo, Brett, what about the lowest common multiple of dividing the remainder of the thermal coupling?"

Yes, we considered this, and predicted this very question.  Let me put you at ease.  The thermal couplings aren't capable of generating the 1.21 jigawatts of electricity that is necessary to bring B into NYC to play for the Jets.  I mean, what we would need, is a bolt of lightning... yes, that's right, a bolt of lightning!

Be honest with yourselves.  Any-way-you-cut-it, if we break it down, no matter what continent we're on, no matter what unit of measurement we implement...

A + B = Superbowl.

or, the same equation another way:

Jets' Superbowl Parade + (A + B)  = Highly likely.

Actually, we sent the results to a lab in Switzerland and they just got back to us with their findings.  It turns out that this formula would work for the next 3 years.  After 3 years, B would dissolve into itself, leaving A to float back to the surface.  Brilliant!

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